You love your child, and you want to do what’s right for them. You aren’t so sure that your ex-partner is doing all she should be doing for them. Every time you go online, she’s denigrating you. Every time you open a message from her, she’s asking for money or saying what a bad parent you are.
You pay child support on time and know that your children should have all they need, but yet they come to you with worn out clothing and items that are broken. What is happening? Can you change your custody order to get them out of what appears to be a bad situation?
Talk to the other parent first
To start with, you may want to talk to the other parent about why your children are coming to your with damaged clothing. Perhaps there was an issue where they went to you with new clothes and came back in an older set that your ex was unhappy about. Maybe there was an increase in rent that has limited her ability to buy new clothes as often as they’re needed. Start by asking, so you can find out if there is anything you can do to help.
If your ex says that there is no problem or ignores your attempts to help, then keep that information and reach out to your attorney. Your attorney may be able to help you find out what’s going on or to have you submit a modification of custody request to the court. With a modification request, you can ask for more custody time with your kids or even for sole custody, depending on how bad the situation seems.
Will the court give you full custody if the other parent isn’t using child support correctly?
There is no right or wrong way to use support, technically, but if you can see that your children are going without because of their mother’s actions, then you may want to seek more time with them. The court may be reluctant to give full custody, but changes, such as requiring visitation with supervision, could be implemented to make sure your children are being cared for.
If issues continue with your communication, you may also want to look into having a court-monitored messaging program through which you both need to communicate. This would also help build your case if the other parent was disparaging or rude to you through it.